her vagine was all disorganized.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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