O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
