watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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