Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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