still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
