You can't motorboat a personality
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
