we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
