What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Randomize
