real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
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I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
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Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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