he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
