I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
