yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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