Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
