More tranny stories later!
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
