That's intense
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Randomize