i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I have tasted many bathrooms
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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