the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
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