But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
