More tranny stories later!
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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