I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
COCAINE IS GR8
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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