She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I'm like, not good at living.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Success! We fucked roommates!
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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