yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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