That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
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They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
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I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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