he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
It's shark week go big or go home
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
