he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize