you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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