I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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