Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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