chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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