While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
