My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
