Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
