I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
