is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I want to walk on stilts...naked
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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