no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
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