I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
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What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
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God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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