No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
