Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Randomize