wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
where does the pee come out of this thing
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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