I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
