Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
