I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great