why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
