Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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