Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
