it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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