Whod you bang
You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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