My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Four minutes until I can fart!
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
