I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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