the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
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