Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
