You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize