I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
